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Running a satire page is no small feat, but one Instagram page proves otherwise. The Crooked Cougar (@thecrookedcougar) provides a playful twist to UH’s student-run newspaper, The Cougar. With about 1,500 followers and counting, the satire page entertains the UH community with comical posts reporting fake events happening around the University. In light of becoming an internet sensation among the UH community, the anonymous owner behind the page opened up about the creation of the account with Ashley Gwananji, a member of The Cougar.

1. What is your first and last name, major, class standing, and preferred pronouns? 

First Name: Crooked 

Last Name: Cougar 

Major: Chaos 

Class Standing: Yes 

Preferred Pronouns: he/he or ha/ha 

2. How did the Crooked Cougar get started? What inspired you? 

The Crooked Cougar was born on a random day in February of 2021. It was an odd time for UH students: we were approaching one year living through an international pandemic, and it got many people reflecting on all the changes that had happened. The world had gotten very weird very quickly, and it was being handled with a stifling level of seriousness. News anchors and professors all droned on gravely about the curve and these unprecedented times and worst of all, the new normal.

Well, life isn’t normal, is it? I haven’t ever seen the bottom half of my coworker’s face. I shared the sidewalk with a robot today. There is an obscene amount of lamb-based meals in the dining hall. None of it is normal! It’s weird! Don’t you ever realize how crazy it all is and want to laugh? So that’s why The Crooked Cougar came into being: to open people’s eyes to the utter absurdity of life, using a twist of satire. 

3. Do you have any beef with The Cougar? Why are you (The Cougar) enemies? Is this one sided beef? 

Why are we enemies? Oh, dearest nemesis, what is a yin without a yang? What is a hero without a villain? One of us had to be the evil twin, it’s simply a matter of balance. The beef is there, although the one-sidedness of it depends on you, I suppose. 

4. What are your opinions on Cooglife?

You are cooler than my brother and I like your style.

4. In your journey of running the account, what are some things you’ve learned? 

I have learned a lot of things about UH students while running this account, and I have determined that there are three constants that are true for any coog, no matter who you are: 

1. We worship supreme leader Renu Khator 

2. We are just a little afraid of the campus squirrels 

3. We share a collective, personal hatred for UH Parking & Transportation Office

5. What motivates you to keep going and why? 

My motivation lies solely in my desire to spite you, esteemed rival. One day when my ranks have grown sufficiently, we shall battle and determine who is the alpha twin, once and for all! Until then, though, I am pleased that others enjoy my content and amused by their creative submissions to the tip line. Their participation encourages me greatly, and I plan to reward them generously once my plan for campus domination succeeds. 

6. How do you feel to be a comedic relief for so many in the UH community? Especially some of the Cougar staff? 

I am delighted to be of service, and even more delighted that I have drawn some of your goody-two-shoes minions to the dark side! There may be Crooked Cougar spies in your very midst right now.

7. Anything else?

I would like to thank you for this opportunity, although I am certain it is part of a greater scheme. Attempting to cajole me into a redemption arc with your flattery…nice try. I look forward to our continued rivalry, and I ask that you would respect my wishes to retain my secret identity. Mystery is a part of my charm. 

Your Sworn Enemy, 

@thecrookedcougar 

About the Author

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